Granny's Notebook

How to Set a Proper Table

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Traditionally, of course, a proper table is covered with a cloth. Tablecloths originated in Rome and represented wealth and dignity during the Medieval period. Damascus in Syria produced the best cloths, called damask, like my family heirloom. Centuries ago, several tablecloths were laid one on top of another, each to be removed after a course. This practice is still followed today in some cultures, in North Africa, for example. Then in early 18th century England, very fine wood tables were meant to be shown off, so doilies, named for D'Oyley, a London draper who is said to have invented them, came into use. These in turn became place mats.

Place Setting:  The plate is the flat dinner plate, sometimes with a soup bowl set on it, since the soup would be served first.

The plate is then flanked by knife and tablespoon on the right and usually two forks on the left. Utensils are placed to make picking them up and using them efficient and simple. The knife should be turned so the blade edge is on the left, next to the plate, a consideration dating from when knives were razor sharp. The forks, a larger dinner fork and a smaller salad fork, are placed in order of use from the outside in. In Europe the forks and spoons are usually turned so the tines and bowls face down.

To the left of the forks, there can be a small bread and butter plate with a butter knife placed across it near the top. Though butter is never served at a formal dinner or banquet and bread is optional, Thanksgiving is different. Aunt Alice may have made pumpkin bread, or Uncle Brent may have brought biscuits or cornbread, so the bread plate is useful.

For the dessert service these days, a teaspoon with the handle on the right and a dessert or cake fork with the handle on the left are often set horizontally above the dinner plate. The dessert fork and teaspoon can be omitted from the setting and added later, after the main dish has been cleared.

Glassware: Two glasses, a larger one for water and a smaller one for wine, should be positioned above the knife, with the wineglass to the right of the water goblet. Stemmed glassware is a sign of refinement. But until well into the 19th century, no glassware was placed directly on the table. It was lined up on a side table and offered by servants, already filled.

A napkin, simply folded -- and for a nice dinner, cloth, never paper -- might go to the left of the forks, but the 1960 edition of Emily Post's Etiquette insists the napkin belongs on the dinner plate itself. And she also noted that fancy foldings are in bad taste. Today, unless lobster is on the menu, the custom of tying a large napkin around one's neck is no longer accepted at a formal dinner, as it was in the 18th century. Napkin rings once held napkins that were reused, but are now merely decorative.

There are other niceties of the table that deserve to be observed. Only wine can be placed on the table in its original bottle. Water, juice and other drinks should be offered in pitchers or carafes.

Here's the rules:

Use the silverware farthest from your plate first.

Eat to your left, drink to your right. Any food dish to the left is yours, and any glass to the right is yours.

Starting with the knife, fork, or spoon that is farthest from your plate, work your way in, using one utensil for each course. The salad fork is on your outermost left, followed by your dinner fork. Your soup spoon is on your outermost right, tea spoon, and dinner knife. Your dessert spoon and fork are usually brought out with dessert. If you remember the rule to work from the outside in, you'll be fine.

Use one of two methods when using the fork and knife:

American Style:  Knife in right hand, fork in left hand holding food.  After a few bite-sized pieces of food are cut, place knife on edge of plate with blades facing in. Eat food by switching fork to right hand (unless you are left handed).

Continental/European Style:  Knife in right hand, fork in left hand.  Eat food with fork still in left hand. The difference is that you don't switch hands-you eat with your fork in your left hand, with the prongs curving downward.

Once used, your utensils, including the handles, should not touch the table again. Always rest forks, knives, and spoons on the side of your plate or in the bowl.

For more formal dinners, from course to course, your tableware will be taken away and replaced as needed.

To signal that your are done with the course, rest your fork, tines up, and knife blade in, with the handles resting at five o'clock an tips pointing to ten o'clock on your plate.

Any unused silverware is simply left on the table.

This is one example of a formal table setting.  It can become more elaborate as more utensils , glassware, or dishes are added with additional courses.